By Richard Evans, Chief Reporter

PROCESSED and full of saturated fats and e-numbers we should all stay away from fast food.
But whether you have a weakness for French fries, lard-shakes, burgers or pizza we all have our moments of over-indulgence, usually the morning after the night before, but I’ve just bought a new mountain bike and had my cholesterol checked so why not?

Unfortunately the service I’ve been getting at my weekly scoffs of late has been as bad for my (mental) health as any gristly gherkin adorned steak.
Ok so McDonalds is not The Ivy, and none of us expect to be treated with a red carpet or any airs or graces, it’s a matter of get in, grab your heart-attack inducing bun and diet coke (so it’s ok to eat as long as the drink is “diet” right?) and get out.
But last week I think I actually aged about two-years while waiting for my burger due to a young girl continuing to serve the drive-through and forgetting the poor blighters in the actual “restaurant” itself. She did however offer me a dessert, but I was in a (Mc)hurry so gratefully declined.

And don’t even get me started on ketchup. The amount of fat people in America alone pays testament to McDonald’s being the world’s largest and most successful fast-food franchise yet they’re still more stingy with the tomato sauce than a Jewish Scotsman who’s completed a law degree (that’s just a joke to any politically sensitive learned Hamish McCohens out there). No matter how many times you ask for the red stuff you still get to your home/desk/canteen to find the sauce has gone awol.
However McDonald’s staff were completely outdone the other week while on a trip to Colwyn Bay’s Wetherspoon’s. Slightly weary from a lively night watching the football the previous evening I wondered in to the former cinema and ordered my meal as well as a diet coke and a hot chocolate for my wife.
The response left me speechless.

I was unable to even complain, protest or even form a sentence. On my request for a hot chocolate the young girl replied, literally word for word: “Hot chocolate, can’t you have something else? I’ve already done six of those today and they’re a pain in the a## to make.”
In the great British tradition I nodded ordered a coffee and shuffled away.

Anyway I’ve decided enough is enough. So for lunch today I think I’ll instead pick-up some fruit and a healthy sandwich prepared on wholemeal bread, albeit from the nearest supermarket where I can now serve myself. Maybe my arteries will have a nice day.

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